Quote by Shadi Kamal Kandil: “Sometimes I feel proud of myself, not because o...”
Why do I feel so bad about myself?
Negative self-talk can be so much a part of the running dialogue in your head that you may not even notice it. However, it's important to recognize these feelings towards yourself if you want lasting change in your life. Research shows that while negative emotions can create short-term motivation, they're not effective in creating lasting changes in your behavior. While it's understandable to think that strongly felt negative emotions like regret, shame, fear, and guilt should be able to catalyze lasting behavior change, the opposite is true," says science writer David DiSalvo. One review of more than behavior change studies found that negative emotions such as fear and regret were actually the least effective change motivators.
Feeling bad about oneself is a common response to realising that one has acted wrongly, or that one could have done something morally better. It is a reaction that is at least partly inspired by a cultural background that Western civilisation has been carrying on its back for centuries. But contrary to appearances and folk beliefs, not only does our tendency to feel guilty fail to promote morality, it can also be an obstacle to moral behaviour. I can think of at least seven reasons for why feeling bad about oneself is not useful or desirable for the purposes of leading an ethical life:. Feeling guilty is not necessary for leading an ethical life. In other words, it seems to be perfectly possible to have a very ethical life without having to feel guilty when errors or mistakes are made.
One common form of suffering involves the feeling of shriveling up inside from allegedly being bad, unworthy, flawed, and defective. Such people can go through life anticipating being seen by others in a negative light. They expect that they might, at any moment, be exposed as a fake or a phony.
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We are too flawed, too sick, and too far gone. In this video, others talk about dealing with these same issues. Their message: we are not alone, and it is possible to change the way we see ourselves. When we sin we lessen the influence of the Spirit in our lives. It can be easy to get caught up in a cycle of using pornography and shaming ourselves. Making mistakes does not mean that we are bad people. By remembering that we are children of God, we can interrupt the cycle of shame and find hope.
I remember one day when I was around six years old, my older brother came home from school with one of those star-shaped highlighters that had a different color on each point. I laid my eyes on it and in that moment I wanted nothing more than I wanted that highlighter. I scribbled an obscure masterpiece of color for a solid five minutes—until my pupils dilated at the new pencil case my brother had pulled out of his school-bag. Anything he had, I wanted. It seemed to follow me as I grew a little older too.
Rather, research has demonstrated the importance of feeling your emotions for exactly what they are, instead of falling into the trap of feeling bad about, well, feeling bad. Researchers at the University of Berkeley recently conducted a study on the science behind these crummy feelings, and our responses as human beings to those emotions. The researchers speculated that accepting negative emotions for what they are could work because it helps conquer feelings of self-judgment. With self-judgment only comes more frustration, accompanied by more guilt and more self-judgment, and so on and so forth. The cycle is easy to fall into, but it can be incredibly hard to break. The study tested the correlation between emotional acceptance and psychological health in more than 1, adults. The results suggested that people who resist acknowledging their emotions for what they truly are are more likely to feel more psychologically stressed.